Holiday Update

It’s been two week since I began my new chemo regimen. The past two days have been good, almost back to how I was feeling prior to this newest chemo cycle. I started working out again yesterday after a week off, always a good sign. I have one week until my next chemo round. I had one minor health success this week. A white coating that has been on my tongue for about a year is 95% gone. I can’t tell you the amount of time and energy trying to get rid of this stuff… brushing, scraping, multiple medicines, many different rinses, and visits to more than one oncology clinic. Nothing worked; it was frustrating! I was told that it was harmless bacteria, but nonetheless, it bothered me. I suspected it was a combination of my nutrition drink and a lack of saliva. My salivary glands are almost completely shot due to the radiation treatments and surgeries. About 5 days ago I began using an over-the-counter mouth moisturizing spray. The white coating on my tongue is practically gone. Poof, like magic. I’ll have to ask my doctor about this next week to make sure it is safe to use, but for now I’ll celebrate the small victory.

The holidays for me have been filled with friends, family, and a lot of good wishes this season. I wish you all my best and a HEALTHY and happy new year.

Chemo Update

Hi. I’ve received a lot of e-mails and a few terrific comments posted on my blog from my December 13th posting. Thank you to everyone that has checked in, provided insight into some of their own experiences, or is just thinking of me and wishing me well.

Here’s the chemo update. Avastin, a newer chemo drug, was administered 8 days ago on December 11th. I also began taking the daily Tarceva pill, another chemo drug, that same day. This stuff has kicked my butt. Side effects in order of discomfort so far have been: a severe debilitating headache lasting about 36 hours (almost gone now), toe/foot numbness (seems to be diminishing), fatigue (it kicked in about the time of the headache), severe skin rash on my face, loss of appetite, and then a few more minor ailments. As I write this, I’m feeling tired, but okay. I spoke with my doctor’s Physician Assistant earlier in this week. She and my doctor are hoping that these are initial reactions to the new drugs and that they will diminish. Guess what? I hope they’re right! Time will tell. As I’ve said before, on paper, this looks like a promising path to a cure, but I have to be able to tolerate this drug regimen. The targeted delivery duration of this drug cocktail is 6 – 12 months. My next Avastin dose is scheduled for January 2nd, once every three weeks.

That’s it for today. Take care everyone.

December 13 2007

Published at 12:01 AM CST on 12/13/07.

Hi. I’ve been waiting to write about this day for the past 2 – 3 months. It has special significance to me. One year ago today I had a follow up visit with my surgeon to review the results of my latest CT scan w/contrast. The scan showed five cancer hot spots; they were all in areas which my surgeon felt were inoperable. I thought to myself, “how the hell did I get here?” Five months and one day earlier on 7/12/06 I had gone though an incredibly difficult surgery. To review the bidding, the surgery took twelve hours, removed body parts, took body parts from two places and put them in other places, put me in the ICU for 2 days where I was sure I was going to die, then another 7 days in the hospital. I had a tracheotomy for about 4 weeks (that was torture) not to mention a number of other tubes. My family and friends were incredible during my slow recuperation. Fast forward to 12/13/06, I showed no evidence of disease for five months and 1 day following that surgery. Now, here I was again! I was back in my surgeon’s office with five friggin cancerous hot spots. I asked him the question that many, although not all, cancer patients ask their doctors. What’s my prognosis? If you think about it, it’s not really the question that’s tough, it’s the answer. He said I should be thinking in months, not years. I guess that’s an easier way than saying soon. He said he had an obligation to mention the potential use of the palliatative care unit at my cancer center. I’ve written about this before, but to revisit it, that’s the unit that tries to make you as comfortable as possible until death. Cure is not their goal. My surgeon also suggested a visit with my chemo doctor. At this point in my life on 12/13/06, I had just begun getting my life back together. My speech was coming back strongly, my strength was back due to an aggressive workout program, my golf game was beginning to improve, and I was considering going back to work in early January. I deluded myself into thinking that I was actually going to escape and leave Cancer World behind. Good bye and good riddance. I had been told once before that I had a few months to live. That was in June 2006 when my surgeon said that without the surgery, I would die before yearend. By our conversation, I could tell that he believed it would be significantly before yearend 2006. With the surgery, there was a 15% chance of a cure. I left my surgeon office on 12/13/06. Given the odds, I was disappointed, but not surprised. I then met with my chemo doctor that same day. It seemed like a better choice than the palliative care unit. On 12/20/06, I began my third cycle of chemo. Chemo continued for almost 9 months until 9/12/07. One might think that I have to look these dates up, but I don’t, they are etched firmly in my mind. The chemo was brutal during about 50% of this time. Fatigue was the primary culprit. Limb numbness was also high on the list of why one tries to stay healthy and avoid chemo. I had six different cycles of chemo during this timeframe (dozens of rounds) and they were successful for the most part. In June and in October 2007 I had two more surgeries to remove new cancer growths (they were not part of the original 5 hot spots that were on the scan on 12/06). The surgeries weren’t trivial, but certainly not on the scale of the one on July 12 2006. It’s been a rough 12 months. I’ve tried putting my energy into being a good father, being more generous, and keeping myself healthy. Some of these goals have been more successful for me than others. I’m glad I’m still here a year later. I’m happy for the family, friends, doctors, care givers, and researchers that have stuck by me. THANK YOU again and again and again, I couldn’t do it without all of you. I’m hoping this new chemo regimen that I began yesterday will result in a cure. On paper it shows promise for my specific disease. Hope is key to cancer patients that haven’t given up. I hope this coming year is a bit easier than the past 12 months and I hope I’m here and feeling well on December 13 2008 so that I can write this story all over again one more time.

Take care everyone.

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Lindsay Dee Lohan is an Hollywood actress and pop music singer.She is the eldest child of Donata, a former Rockette, and Michael Douglas Lohan, a one time actor.Lohan rose to stardom with her leading roles in the films Freaky Friday, Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen, Mean Girls and Herbie: Fully Loaded.

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Jennifer Lynn Lopez, popularly known as J.Lo, is an hollywood actress, singer, songwriter and Top celebrity. Lopez was born and grew up in the South Bronx, New york.Lopez's parents, Guadalupe Rodríguez was a kindergarten teacher and David Lopez,was a computer specialist. She has had relationships with Ojani Noa, Cris Judd, Sean Combs, Ben Affleck, and most recently, Marc Anthony, with whom she is expecting her first child.

On February 14, 2007, Lopez received the Artists for Amnesty International award "in recognition of her work as producer and star of Bordertown, a film exposing the ongoing murders of hundreds of women in the border city of Juárez, Mexico ".She the most influential Hispanic entertainer in America according to People en Español's list of "100 Most Influential Hispanics" and according to Forbes Jennifer Lopez is the richest Latin American in Hollywood.

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Chemo Cycle 9 – Round 1

Here’s a quick up. It was a long day today, but not nearly as long as some in the past. I met with my chemo doctor… on time! Actually, due to incredibly heavy traffic I was 15 minutes late and he was waiting for me. He typically doesn’t see Head & Neck patients on Tuesdays, but he made an exception for me today which I appreciate. We then connected with a friend on the research staff for a short holiday reunion before heading off to the chemo unit. Chemo began about an hour late, but only lasted 2 hours. Compared to some sessions which have lasted 12 hours, this felt like a day at the beach. The drug being used is Avastin and it will be delivered once every three weeks. There is a 2% incidence of serious side effects… heart attack, stroke, and death. Waning signs, if any, leading up to these side effects include fever and high blood pressure. So, I’ll have to be on the lookout for these conditions. 2% isn’t a large number; however it would suck to be in that 2%. I also began taking a daily pill, 150 mg Tarceva. My doctor plans to leave me on this treatment regimen for 6 to 12 months or for as long as I can tolerate it. It’s somewhat viewed as a maintenance program. I won’t know how the drug will affect me stamina-wise for awhile. It’s one of my concerns and time will tell. I can continue to workout as long as I feel up to it, but not with the intensity of the past month. That part I will miss.

I’ll keep you posted. Take care everyone.

Chemo Restarts Tomorrow

I spoke with my doctor today. We will begin a chemo cocktail of Avastin and Tarceva beginning tomorrow (12/11/07). This will be chemo cycle #9. Avastin is delivered via an IV and Tarceva will be a daily pill. The Avastin will be scheduled every three weeks. The duration is to be determined based on my tolerance and my doctor's ongoing assessment. It’s typically delivered for 6 rounds. I have a lot of mixed feelings about this. On one hand, I have no evidence of active disease. On the other hand, both my doctor (most important) and I believe based on all of my recurrences (4 in the past 2 years), it is only a matter of time before my disease resurfaces in the form of a new detectable hot spot / tumor. I’d love to wait as I’m feeling pretty good right now, but I don’t want to risk having more body parts, like more of my tongue, surgically removed. The old saying, between a rock and a hard place, sums it up nicely. I suspect it will be a long day tomorrow between meeting with my doctor, getting blood work done, and then having the chemo scheduled and delivered.

One can look Avastin up on Google. The side effects are pretty scary; but, so is my cancer. Potential side effects include stoke, heart attack, death, difficulty breathing, weakness, and the list goes on. Once again, between a rock and a hard place, seems fitting.

Wish me luck. I’ll keep you posted. Take care everyone.

A General Update

There’s not a whole lot to report out on since getting the balls rolling with my next steps a few days ago. Another of my potential treatment option paths, a phase II Head and Neck drug trial at the Dana Farber Cancer Institute in Boston is now off the table due to prior use of Docetaxel a year ago. I am continuing to explore the use of another trial drug following a few different avenues and also keeping in mind the Avastin / Tarceva path option discussed with my doctor on Thanksgiving Day almost two weeks ago. I hope to have a clear direction by the end of this week or at the latest, early next week.

My workouts are coming along quite well. I’ve increased my aerobic intensity 40% (based on calories burned) in a 30 minute period and am now using 5 to 20 pound dumbbells in place of the 5 pound dumbbells I began with on 11/10/07. I’ve averaged 5 workouts per week during this 4 week period, but plan to drop down to 4 per week to give my body a chance to build itself up between exercise days. Muscles build themselves up by repairing themselves after a workout and they need a day break between workouts to do this repair. I’m not sure this is factual, but as you get older, one has a tendency to state as fact what someone somewhere once told them. I think that Andy Rooney of 60 Minutes would agree with me on this one.

I feel more like I’m moving from Cancer World back to the world I once knew. I’m not there yet, but I’m headed in the right direction. My eating and talking will never be back to “normal,” but I’ll get past that within the next few months if I can keep the disease from returning. Traveling is still pretty much out of the question due to the resulting stress and hardship caused by these two disabilities.

For those of you that follow Leroy Siever’s NPR cancer blog (and even for those of you that don’t), he has had three blog entries in the last four entries that have resonated with me this past week. The NPR website URL is at…

http://www.npr.org/blogs/mycancer/

The blog entries are:
12/04/07 – Enjoying the Lights this Year
12/03/07 – Getting Your Hopes Up
11/29/07 – Suspended in Time

They were all so well written and so close to my own feelings at one time or another in the recent past. So, if you’re interested in better understanding the perspective of a longer term cancer patient and to a large degree, me, I encourage you to read his blog. I posted a comment on his blog on 12/03/07; this is something I do about once per month. When he is feeling well enough, he reads the comments which can range from a low of 50 to up to 200 per day. He has really touched a nerve in this cancer world which was largely unknown to many of us, me included, until recently. That's not to say one hasn't been touched by cancer, but there is a difference between being touched by cancer and truly understanding the impact.

Take care everyone and thanks once again for staying in touch.

A Reinterpretation of Recent Events

It’s been an intense past 10 days for me in Cancer World. With new clarity, I need to retract part of my last blog entry. I believed what I wrote when I wrote it, but after talking to a few people close to me and my situation, I have a new take on what my doctor was telling me in my visit with him the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. I think he was telling me to enjoy this time right now, there would be more disease and chemo later, and when that time came, he would be there to help me through it. Bottom line, I wanted to be more aggressive in fighting off a recurrence and he wanted me to enjoy the holiday. So, we’re now back together on the same page.

I have been exploring a few new avenues and it is still a rocky ride. One avenue was a Head & Neck cancer vaccine trial at the University of Pittsburgh Cancer Institute. The vaccine used part of one’s own blood cells to boost their own immune system. It is in early trials, 10 people over the past year. So far, it is showing success. Unfortunately, after having my blood tested for a specific blood type, HLA A2, I was negative for this blood type and therefore ineligible for this trial. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

I am exploring the use of another trial drug following a few different avenues and also keeping in mind the Avastin / Tarceva path option discussed last week with my doctor. My friends and family have been very generous in helping me explore some of these options via their contacts and knowledge. You know who you are and thank you so much for all that you have done.

I’m continuing to exercise and build up my stamina. That usually feels really good. I’ve also been able to back off of some of the pain and anxiety medicines. Ideally, I could get rid of them all together. I went on a liquid diet about 2 weeks ago and that seems to be helping with letting my tongue heal. But, I’m looking forward to real food again in the near future.

Have a terrific weekend. Take care everyone.

The Roller Coaster Ride Continues

First off, I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving with family and friends. We had a lot of wonderful visitors.

I haven’t written in a week due partially to the holiday, but mostly because I’m digesting the most recent discussion with my primary oncologist. We met with him last Wednesday. My interpretation of his message was that 1) he felt that I still had cancer, 2) I was out of options, and 3) he believed the best life for me would be to not continue any more treatment. Basically, go home, give up hope for a cure, and let nature take its course. He called us at home on Thanksgiving morning (about 12 hours after we met with him) and said he rethought our discussion and would like to explore one more chemo option, a drug cocktail of Avastin and Tarceva to be delivered sometime in December. So, I’m mulling this around at the same time I’m exploring a drug currently undergoing clinical trials for Head and Neck and other cancers. Although this drug shows a lot of hope, I don’t qualify for any of the 27 trials currently in progress across 20 countries due to prior treatments. I’m also beginning to explore obtaining this drug through a “compassionate use” program that some drug companies offer. Needless to say, this is confusing and depressing. As I figure this out, I’ll provide a new blog entry.

Nobody ever said that cancer was easy; this past week was a real reminder of how tough it can be. Take care everyone.

P.S. To justme519 (Tanya). Thank you for keeping up with my progress and your best wishes.

Randy Pausch update

He is the Carnegie-Mellon University (CMU) professor that I wrote about in this blog on September 20 2007 who delivered his “last lecture.” I like to follow certain stories and topics and Randy Pausch is one of them. He was being treated with two palliative chemo drugs, Gemcitabine and Tarceva. These are two of the same chemo drugs I have been on this year, but in my case the hope was for a cure, not palliatative. Randy has pancreatic cancer and was given a few months to live a few months ago. The palliative chemotherapy that he had taken for six weeks to try slowing the spread of his cancer appears to be doing more. The tumors in his spleen are gone, and the dozen tumors in his liver are either stable or shrinking. His doctor said that 85% of patients in Randy’s situation show NO response with these drugs. Randy looks to be in the fortunate 15% who are showing a response and his response seems remarkable. As other cancer survivors, physicians, and caretakers have reminded me over the past two years, each of us is really a statistic of one or zero, we either make it or we don’t. With Randy gaining several extra months of healthy life, he is now eligible for other, more experimental, treatments. His doctors at the University of Pittsburgh Cancer Institute (UPCI) are looking into other chemotherapy drugs and a custom vaccine made from his own cancer cells. Randy continues to have a positive outlook, but not in a Pollyannaish way. As Randy’s story continues, I’ll be sure to provide an update. He is now a beacon of hope for other cancer patients. And, to emphasize one more important point, a custom cancer vaccine from one’s own tumor cells, how cool is that? Yet another recent development in the fight of this killer disease.

Exercising

My preparation in getting ready for my next chemo treatment is coming along. I have done a light workout each day for the past six days and plan to continue working out daily as long into my next chemo cycle as possible. My workouts consist of light aerobics for 30 minutes and then 45 minutes using 5 and 10 pound weights with a bit of head, neck, and back stretching thrown in. It’s still a long way from the 35 pound weights I used to use. However, it feels great to be active again.

Chemo begins in 10 days on November 26 2007. I won’t know the chemo regimen until my clinic visit on November 21 2007. My doctor is still exploring the best possible treatment. It seems like there are so many new options currently hitting the market. Plus, we want to see the results from the new CT scan which will take place on November 20 2007. The pain in my tongue continues to be a serious concern. The pain seems to have subsided a bit, but it is still impacting my ability to eat and talk. I have been able to back off on some of the extra pain medicines and am almost back to pre-surgery pain medicine levels.

The weather here is phenomenal, high 60s and clear skies. It’s really a joy.

I’m not sure how many of you are following Leroy Siever’s cancer journey on the NPR blog website. He is really struggling. He had major back surgery about 6 weeks ago to replace one or more vertebra in which cancer had taken over and a serious infection set in… not to mention a stroke during or immediately following surgery. Now he has a pump attached to his body releasing antibiotics directly into the surgical site in his back every few hours. I liked his blog entry today (11/15/07) which can be seen at URL: http://www.npr.org/blogs/mycancer/. He has almost forgotten about his lung cancer (which is very serious to his longevity) and has replaced that focus with what could be an even deadlier foe. He makes a point that cancer has become a way of life for him with its ebbs and flows. He also realizes that once he recovers from the infection, the cancer will still be waiting for him. In many ways, I feel the same way. It is something that one learns to live with and more than likely, even at times when there is no evidence of disease, it will always be waiting. Cancer is almost like the perfect storm, a foe who is patiently aggressive to the detriment of the victim.

Take care everyone.

The Complete Idiots Guide to Cancer

I did a web search to see if anyone had written a book called, “The Complete Idiots Guide to Cancer.” I didn’t find one. The closest match I found was a book titled, “The Complete Idiots Guide to Living with Breast Cancer.” One of the purposes of this blog is the educate people about cancer. I’ll scratch the surface on two topics today: Cancer cells and chemo-brain.

Cancer Cells. This is pretty basic stuff, but I found it interesting. A tumor is a build up of cells. There are two types of tumors: benign and malignant. A benign tumor is an abnormal growth of normal cells. This can cause health problems, but can usually be addressed via surgery to remove the tumor mass. A malignant tumor is an abnormal growth of abnormal cells. These will cause health problems and can be addressed using surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy. As I’ve mentioned before, cancer patients refer to this as the slash, burn, and poison treatment methods. Cells within the human body replicate on different time tables. Cells which line the stomach wall may divide every 24 hours to replace the cells which have been destroyed during the process of digestion. There are other cells, such as those in one’s nerves, which never (or rarely) divide. There are two main phases to cell growth, the Interphase and the Mitotic phase. For a normal cell to replicate, it must meet 3 criteria: sufficient growth, the need for a new cell, and undamaged DNA. To move from the Interphase to the Mitotic phase, it must meet two more criteria: successful DNA replication and sufficient growth. In cancer cells, these checkpoints do not exist and cancerous cells can divide to their hearts content eventually forming detectable cancer tumors. Once cancer cells enter the blood stream or other paths of least resistance (e.g., the nerve structure), they can move throughout the body. If they find a stronghold somewhere away from the original tumor site, this is called metastasis. Cancer patients refer to these as Mets. In my case, I had extensive perineural invasion of cells within the nerve in my tongue. This was the finding following my surgery in July 2006. As a result, the cancer in my body has traveled from the original tumor site to other areas, but not too far from the original site. It has all stayed in my head and neck area. The normal progression of cancer for people with Head and Neck disease has been cancer metastasizing into the lungs. So far, I’ve been lucky in this respect.

Chemo-Brain. This is a lesser-known side effect of chemotherapy and it causes cognitive dysfunction. It is only recently getting more attention. As there are increasing numbers of long-term cancer survivors who are trying to get back to a normal routine, that's where one begins to notice things like the cognitive side effects of chemotherapy. The shifts can be subtle. It may result in a lack of an ability to concentrate, multi-task, or remember things as well as one used to. The more one’s work or personal life demands these functions, the more one may notice the subtle side effects. Subtle or not, chemo-brain can be frustrating to patients, who may suddenly find themselves unable to accomplish tasks they formerly completed with ease. And it's a mystery to doctors, who are still trying to understand what causes it and who is likely to suffer. The good news is that there are new studies taking place to yield insights into better identifying and tackling this side effect. I know that I feel some of these side effects. They are subtle though. I compensate for it by making greater use of to do lists.

I hope this was informative and at least a little bit interesting today. Take care everyone.

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